Keith at Irvine Spectrum -- 27March2010

Had a pretty slow start, but it wound up being a great time later on. And lots of friends turned up. Right as I played my first tune (badly - not warmed or limbered up yet), friends Doug and Melody came by, on their way to see the musical at OCSHA. Not sure how that makes a logical plan, but I'm not complaining. But they had to go after only three songs, and after the initial dinner rush, the place was pretty empty except for a few very bored husbands looking for a place to sit and wait. They're usually far too grumpy by that time to join in at all.

So I played for myself for quite a while (which was probably OK, since my voice was really unwieldy), but then an old high school friend and her mom came by, all the way down from Washington. Having someone to play for makes all the difference, so suddenly it was big fun (and my voice finally kicked in, too). A couple of songs later, along came Daleen and Geneva, getting some dinner before going shopping for a while. And a while after that, Princess friend Jim and his daughter Emily showed up. Wow -- it's been months since any friends have come out.

And, coincidentally (or maybe related?) there were suddenly lots of other groups of people tuned in -- clapping (and hooting!), and actually competing to get their requests into the queue! It don't rain, but it pours. It was Really Happening for a while there. But Sheri and her mom had to go, and since I haven't seen them in 15 or 20 years, I took a break (!) to chat for a while before they were gone for another 20.

Unfortunately, but naturally, that broke the spell, and the best audience I've had in weeks dissipated, but that's OK -- I had a nice half-hour chat with Sheri and her mom, reminiscing about the old Mariner days.

After they were gone, I played a bit more for Jim and Emily, but it was getting late, so they left, too. It was almost ten, and I was about to pack it in, but suddenly some "my age" ladies were there, clapping appreciatively, so I played some more. And then some couples came by (possibly people who have heard me before -- some folks were specifically asking for James Taylor songs), and it was going far too well, again, to quit -- even though it was past time for me to be off the stage. But the maintenance guys have been coming later and later, so I went ahead and risked it, and ended up playing until about 10:40 -- I'm just a sucker for people who are actually listening. And the fifty bucks...

Just before I finally quit, one of the ladies who had been listening came up to put a buck in the jar and tell me, "You haff a fairy nize voize" in her cartoon Swedish accent. That was fun.

Keith at Irvine Spectrum -- 20Mar2010

Another two-gig weekend, and me sick, to boot. But I'm clearing up, and I did fine. And the weather's getting warmer -- and with the time change seems warmer still, 'cuz I'm essentially starting "an hour earlier".

The highlight came early on, when a Birthday Party of 9 (?) year-old girls, all dressed up as the cast of the new "Alice in Wonderland" movie, stopped by to eat some ice-cream bars on their way to see the movie. (Click the pic to see it bigger.) I got my "start" playing for little girls at Indian Princess campouts, so I'm not only prepared to do it, I love to -- and it was a great and easy way to get the ball rolling. They were already excited to be there, having fun in their costumes, getting even higher on the ice cream, and ready to party with half-a-dozen of my kids' songs.

The Birthday Girl was the Mad Hatter, and I was impressed that they had a set of actual twins to play Tweedle-Dee and Dum. I guess they couldn't find any mouse ears for the Dormouse, 'cuz she had rabbit ears like the White Rabbit and March Hare. She didn't seem to mind. And I liked the blue feather boa around the neck of the Caterpillar. Big fun, all around.

And a pretty good night even after they left. No repeat of the way-too-loud background music from last week, even though I'd neglected to send a nasty-gram to the entertainment lady. Guess it wasn't necessary.

The new songs of the week were "Dear Prudence", and "Lyin' Eyes". Both use my new "capo across only 5 strings" trick. I learned "Prudence" before, playing the real, and surprisingly difficult, fingerpicking arrangement, but it was too hard, and too hard on my hands, to be worth it. I suddenly decided that a simplified arrangement wouldn't kill anybody, so now it's both do-able, and quite nice. And I get to kick in the full "choir" in the harmony box for "won't you come out to play", and it sounds awesome.

And just to show how cocky I'm getting, I transposed and worked up "Lyin' Eyes" at 4:00, for a gig that started at 6 -- with dinner in-between. It's normally strummed, but I don't strum so I'm fingerpicking it, and can "pull out" most of the signature lead line in the intro as I go. The trick is remembering where the "thirds" are for each of the chords as they go by, and making sure to pluck them on the downbeats in (or out of) the fingerpicking pattern, so that the harmony box knows how to sing correctly. It's a bit of a lot to remember, while the song is going by: keeping the picking going and hitting those thirds, kicking the box's buttons on cue, and singing the words, all at the same time. But if it was easy, everybody'd do it.

Had several groups of nice people, families and teens, and made $42. Played a lot of kids' songs -- and not just for the birthday kids. I think I did "Puff" 3 times, a new record. But also "Whole New World", "You'll Be In My Heart", "Waltzing With Bears", even "Rubber Duckie", and several more. And got another request for "Teddy Bears' Picnic", which I hadn't played at all for probably a year, but have now played for the last three gigs running. What's up with that?

Keith at Borders South Coast Plaza -- 19Mar2010

Warren couldn't make it this time, so I went solo. It was probably the most responsive crowd I've ever seen there -- maybe my doing; more likely just luck. But I did come up with a new gag to try to get over the biggest hurdle of every gig -- how to get started -- and maybe that explains it a little. I always try to start with a standard-issue "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen..." type intro, but it's frequently too awkward to even do that. It's really hard to just start talking, loudly, into a crowd of people, none of whom is even looking up.

So I came up with this idea to say, "OK, wave if you can hear me in the back." (This is pretty standard, and easy enough to break straight into.) But then, "Good. Now keep waving and say: 'Hi, Keith!'". This is pretty lame, but breaks the ice and starts the self-introduction. And I have to say, it worked. People giggled a little, and I was able, since I had some attention, to keep talking, introduce myself, do the other standard joke about the song lists, and start the first song with some connection already started.

I also started with a different song. Usually I start with "With a Little Help From My Friends", just 'cuz it's easy to play and easy on my voice to get warmed up, and the words are kind of appropriate ("What would you do if I sang out of tune? Would you stand up and walk out on me?"). But I've been having a lot of luck with "Hotel California" lately, so I started with that, and got a pretty huge response -- especially for this place. It's just got a lot more "oomph" -- though I played and sang it poorly, without being warmed and limbered up. Still, probably a keeper.

Anyway, I don't think I've ever had applause after every single song, all night, before, at any Borders. Even when I manage to get them started at the beginning, it usually fades out after a while. But there were some friendly and enthusiastic college kids who stayed interested, and other people showed up and got into the spirit as the time went on. Great night. Only nine bucks, but I'll take attention over cash, any time.

I'd had a really bad cold all week, so I wasn't even sure I'd make it at all, but with enough cough medicine and lemonade, I was able to sing OK, and only had to stop to cough in the middle of one song. I did have a slightly breathy/raspy tone that made me wish I knew some Rod Stewart songs, but I don't. I'd'a sounded great on "Maggie May", though...

K&W at Borders Mission Viejo -- 13Mar2010

At the very least, it was nice to play warm for once. But there were some responsive people, and we did quite well ($34 to split) for a Borders gig. $10 of that must have come from a nice but shy lady who had to have her husband make her request for "Lollipop Tree" for her, and who subsequently bought a "Waltzing With Bears" CD to take home. He was friendly, too, and helped out by taking some photos with Warren's camera, and aiming and starting up my new (permanently?) borrowed-from-work Flip video camera.

Had a guy come up and show an amazing agnosticism for instrumentation and style by asking for "anything by 'Cream'", which, of course, we had to turn down -- except that I do play "Can't Find My Way Home", which is by Cream descendent-band "Blind Faith", so I did, but he was gone already anyhow.

But the fun part of playing there is seeing how many of the strolling-by people we can manage to snag on their way past the café. The people already in, or stopping into, the café aren't there for the music, they're there for the seats -- a place to sit and read an unbought book. So they're "listening" whether they want to or not. But the people walking by aren't "stuck" there, and if they stop to listen to the rest of one, or maybe a few songs, that's something.

Keith at Irvine Spectrum -- 12Mar2010

The weather decided to show me that, despite appearances, it's not really Spring yet. I had my warm jacket, but not the thermals that had worked so well in January. So I played with frozen fingers again -- I'm getting used to it.

But it also kept the people at home I guess, because it was pretty sparse. But, hey, once the equipment is all set up, you play anyway -- and it still beats watching TV.

I did have some small groups of people tune in now and again, and it was kind of fun to be able to focus on them directly, since there would often be no one else nearby at all. I had a pair of teenage girls settle in for several tunes (Beatles, natch), and I had a mom come by with two little kids (4 and 5?). The little girl wanted to hear some dance music, so I played "Mister Postman" for her. But not before giving her one of my prepared-in-advance "Easter Egg with dry beans" shakers (Daleen's idea). She didn't really know how to shake it in time, but she was shaking it anyway, and I did several kids' songs for them.

Then some older girls came up and wanted to hear "Waltzing With Bears". Turns out that one of them was an old Princess fan of mine, and knew exactly what to ask for. She also wanted me to sing my "I'm an Indian Princess" song, but there were a dozen or twenty people listening in by now, so I declined. It's one thing to sing that with a hundred little girls joining in at a campout, but quite another to sing it solo in front of strangers.

Later in the evening, a group of 4 vatos with porkpie hats and the requisite tats and earlobe plugs came over and sat right up front, looking tough. But they found a song list and started asking for songs, polite as can be. They always seem to want to hear "Ring of Fire".

But all night long I was fighting against the way-too-loud house music. I called Maintenance, and left a message. I waited an hour and called again, and he said he'd be "right over". I don't need him to come over, I need him to go to where the volume knob is, but whatever. Nothing seemed to happen, so I called again, and he said he'd be right over again, so I just stood there waiting.

The drum track from the "Latin jazz" kind of stuff they have going cuts right through, and is incredibly distracting. He showed up and argued with me over what's "too loud", and whining that if he turned it down here, it would be down all around the area. I told him that that's not my problem -- that I can't play when that stuff is as loud as I am. He said he'd tweak it again and "see how it is over there", and it finally went down enough that I could ignore it for the remaining hour and a half. I don't want to be "that complaining guy" and have them stop booking me, but I also think I deserve a little respect, and an environment that's play-in-able. I'll have to craft a carefully worded email to the event coordinator...

Made only $22, due to the small turnout, but had a lot of fun getting to play some of the lesser-done songs in the book. Like "Ten Degrees and Getting Colder" in honor of my frozen fingers...

"Captain Eo Tribute" at Disneyland -- 05Mar2010

We went to Disneyland to check out the "Captain Eo" movie that they revived because of Michael Jackson's death. Actually, it's billed as a "Captian Eo" *Tribute*, which I guess means that this is not the real Michael Jackson, but a impersonator. He sure looked like the real one though, and I'd'a bet it was really him, until he delivered his first uber-dramatic line, "We're going in!", and it was dubbed in by a 10-year-old girl -- probably Dakota Fanning. That kind shattered the illusion.

Anyway, Michael/Dakota is the pilot of a little egg-shaped ship, with a crew of robots stolen from that lame "Wizard of Oz" sequel, a two-headed muppet, an untidy blue elephant (cast to deliver the requisite amount of vaguely not-quite-fart jokes), and a cute little flying thing with a human-wrist-shaped blank spot where he sits.

They get yelled at by Admiral Bushy-brows over Princess Leia's video phone, who tells them to go fly through some recycled Death Star tunnels to find a green "beacon" light, despite their actual goal being the Wicked Witch of the West's "throne room", where she's gotten herself tangled up in a bunch of industrial tubing that's inexplicably dangling from the ceiling. She's been up there so long that her fingernails are four inches long, and she's pretty grumpy about it.

Michael/Dakota and crew show up and she immediately tries to throw them in the dungeon, but they insist on putting on a show first. Queen Giger-Makeup can't really stop them, since she's still stuck to the ceiling, and her guards keep getting their half-a-mile-of-industrial-tubing costumes turned into brightly-colored shredded Flashdance Lycra by some rainbow beams that inexplicably come from a few inches left-and-above of Michael's palms, like he's some kind of fabulous-costume-and-makeup spewing gay Spiderman.

But he's not, he's Tribute to Michael Jackson, so he gets all the newly-costumed Not-Zombies into a Not-a-Triangle diamond-shaped arrangement, and does a Not-the-Thriller dance, to a hoppin' beat laid down by Gumby versions of his robot friends who have transformed into a set of self-playing metal drums, a synth played by the Flatulephant, and Spock's stand-up bass played by the rear-end-less flying butterfly-monkey. The theater itself tries to get in on the action, thumping the seats up and down just a quarter beat off the actual rhythm.

Queen Cargo-Net-Accident is apparently even more sick of Michael's crotch-thrusts than the rest of us, so she starts screaming and swinging back and forth in her nightmare-hammock, until Michael send out one more blast of Gay Power from his almost-palms, which transforms her steam-factory palace into a Greek temple, breaks her down from the ceiling, and turns her into Aurora, Bringer of the Dawn from Fantasia.

This was apparently Michael/Dakota's mission from the beginning -- bringing Fabulousness to the non-Fabulous -- so he gathers up his de-transformed crew/band, and while misusing the definite article in the first decipherable lyrics of the whole show, departs with "We are here to chaaaaange the wuuuuurld".

Fortunately, this Star Wars/Thriller mash-up/rip-off was perpetrated by the actual rights-holders of those properties, so lawsuits don't ensue as Michael/Dakota flies off in his Space-Combi into a twinkling starfield.

Keith at Irvine Spectrum -- 26Feb2010

Another low-key but big-fun night. The sound seems way better these days -- probably because of smarter placement of the monitor speaker. It's tricky, 'cuz you have to be able to hear it, but if it's pointing too much at your mic or guitar, you get feedback. I've tried lots of places, and none have worked very well, until I lately tried putting it on the ground in front of me. This is where everyone else puts it, and, surprise! (not?), it works really well there. Sometimes I think I'm so smart that I'm an idiot.

Not too cold, finally. Lots of teens out and about, some individual packs coming by again and again. Had that thing again, where I can't get anyone to come up and get a song list and make requests off of it, until one group finally does, and when the other groups see them reading the list and requesting, they get jealous and jump up to get their own list. So I go from nobody making requests to having to queue them up, and put people off with "OK, I'll do that one after I get to their one, and their one..." When it rains...

I snapped one of my foot pedals right in two -- I guess I was stepping on it to press the button and kind of lost my balance, so I put my full weight on it. That Pergo flooring stuff I made it out of is really strong and stiff for its thickness, but now I guess I know its limits. Fortunately, I have more at home and it was easy to just make another piece, good as new.

Strangely, exactly $49 again, same as Saturday last week. Which possibly disproves Saturdays being better than Fridays? Or more likely proves that the tip results are essentially random -- or based on factors more important than which day it is, like, oh I don't know, how well I'm playing, and who shows up?

I'm up again next Saturday, but the weather report says it's gonna rain, so maybe not.